Before I tell this story, let me point out that nobody got hurt. Bruce was both shocked and appalled when he first heard it, but you can go ahead and laugh right from the beginning. Really.

You see, Harley loves paper bags. I learned this because I often stick paper products in his face, and he obligingly tears them up into small pieces. One day I stuck a big paper grocery bag in his face, and not only did he chew up the edge into small pieces, he started climbing onto the edge. As if it were a stiff cardboard box. Which it wasn't. That would support his weight. Which it wouldn't. Lucky for both of us, I managed to put my hand under his feet as he climbed inside, and transfered him and the bag onto the kitchen counter. But grocery bags are big, and the counter is small, so I've tried him out on other bags.

Lunch bags work well, and — surprisingly — wine bags are a favorite. Not the average sack used for bottles of wine, but rather the slightly larger size used by Trader Joe's. Harley walks completely inside to chew the bottom of the bag, and then all the paper under his feet as he slowly backs out again. This one is a medium-sized grocery sack, and is the biggest that will fit comfortably in the kitchen.

The only problem with the Bag Game is that Harley likes to play it on the kitchen counter. No matter how many times I set one out on the coffee table, which is pretty big and only about a foot and a half high, he ignores it. But if I put one on the kitchen counter, tiny and about three feet high, he practically dives inside.

So you can see where this story is going.

Usually, I stand right next to the counter and watch the Finsters while Harley is destroying a paper bag. In fact, I often hold the bottom, so Harley won't nudge the bag right over the edge as he's tearing it up to try to get to my fingers. The Incident occurred when I'd just gotten the new hard drive installed on my laptop, and was distracted by software updates. Now, the computer was on the couch — which, in my small apartment was only about eight feet away from the counter. And I spent most of my time holding the bag for Harley, and only a few moments here and there tending to the computer. Really.

But as is always the case, accidents happen when you're not looking, and Harley fell to the floor, still in the bag.

Now, in my defense, Harley has gotten startled off of much higher spots — but usually he manages to glide just enough with his clipped wing feathers to have a relatively easy landing. And, shortly after the Incident Harley fell off the very same kitchen counter — all of his own doing — and didn't have enough space to glide. And he totally survived.

But still, falling three feet while inside a paper bag can't be very fun.

However, he stepped right up onto my finger, and happily climbed right inside the bag again once I put it back onto the counter. No trauma, no fear of bags, no nothing. Phew!

Meanwhile, I still hadn't finished setting up the computer. Don't worry! No instant replays. But I toyed briefly with opening the drawer, so Harley wouldn't have so far to fall if he nudged the bag off the counter again.

No such luck. Turns out flatware and miscellaneous junk is much more interesting than a brown paper sack.